Friday, August 18, 2006

Sadness

So............I thought I was sad about one thing today, when in reality I am MUCH sadder about something else. My computer was returned to me this afternnon by a nice gentleman who actually drives a white truck, not a brown one as stated earier. After mispronouncing my last name he did offer to carry the box inside for me. My cousin and I anxiously opened the box, Mr. Bailey plugged everything back in, we followed all of the instructions and POOF my computer proceeded to shut itself off after 4 short minutes. And we repeated this cycle 5 or so more times. Mr. Brick called the nice people in Indi, oh I mean California, who proimised a speedy recovery, and yet, here I sit at the other Brick House, yet again.........
It was here I found my real sadness. Mr. Brick's aunt is dying of brain cancer. There is no question of this now, the doctors have stopped all chemotherapy and taken her off steriods, leaving only heavy doses of other medication to relieve her constant pain. The end should come quickly and for her sake I hope it does. My tears are for her and how short her life has been cut, as she is only in her early 60s. But selfishly the tears are more for me and the uncertainity of life. The fragileness of our earthly bodies and health. I am a Christian, I know where I will end up and also where most everyone I love will end up, yet, the unknown is scary and the end of the known even more so. I look at my beautiful baby bricks and I am filled with tears at the thought of the time when their grandparetns leave this earth, when, not if, other pains hurt them. I see so much excitement in their future as well as the certainity of pain. I would not trade the pain for a life feeling nothing, but it still hurts.
Thank you for the welcome backs........if you leave an anonymous comment, could you leave me some sort of clue as to who you are? I love knowing folks are reading this and keeping up with us! love, mrs.brick

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I completely empathize with your sadness! I almost got mad at whoever (I don't even know who they are really)wrote that saying "the moment you're born, you start to die" (probably BADLY paraphrased)the first time I heard it. I kindly conjured up a closed lip smile for the messenger, since I knew they meant me no harm. But, I still hate that thought and that saying!!! I'm with ya!

Sorry about the computer hassles! I guess they start to die the moment one buys them, right?!

:-) ,
Quiltermama

Anonymous said...

And, I'm deeply sorry to hear about Mr. Brick's aunt. How blessed we are to know that life continues on more gloriously once we pass. My prayers are with your family.

Quiltermama

mama-san said...

Sad and scary for me, too. The days seem to pass so much quicker now and there's still so much to be done. The pain is more intense when it comes through your child, even when they are all grown up. I love you.....

Angela said...

You are so wise in your young age! I'll be praying!

SaRaH said...

I know this is weird, but this is why Christmas makes me sad. Can you imagine holding baby Jesus in your arms knowing that He was born to die?! The good thing about being the good mommy that you are is that you will live on in your babies hearts. Heaven is going to be an awesome place. I am sad for you guys, but I will be praying for you. We almost lost someone this weekend too. Perhaps we can have a sad coffee day.